What to do if She Panics?

Certain aspects of labor can lead a laboring woman to panic. She may panic due the force of contractions or due to concerns about the baby or emotional issues. She also may panic if she’s facing an intervention she didn’t want, like a cesarean. If she does start panicking, part of your job as her coach is to help her.

• Take a deep breath. You can’t help her if you’re freaking out yourself.

• Get her attention. Say her name, snap your fingers, clap your hands, get into her face, grab her shoulders, but get her attention.

• Speak calmly and slowly. Make eye contact with her and tell her what she needs to do. Sometimes all they need is someone telling them they’re safe and they’re doing well. If the doctors or nurses want her to do something, slowly repeat their instructions. Moms often do better hearing instructions from coaches than from doctors or nurses. She’s more used to your voice and is likely to respond better to you.

• Have her breathe. Make her focus on her breathing. Tell her how to breathe, such as “Breathe in, Breathe out,”, until she gets herself under control. If you know your partner is more anal, try counting or he…he…he…ho breathing. However, if she’s not panicking never tell her how to breathe--it may lead to panic.

• Remind her the contractions are short. If she’s panicking due the force of contractions, try to let her know when the contraction is peaking (i.e. at its worst) and when it’s getting better. Sometimes giving her specifics (three more breaths and it’ll get better) helps too.

• Remember, sometimes you have to be forceful with moms that panic. Telling her to calm down, stop crying or just listen may be all she needs to focus on you and calm down.

• Reassure her. After the contraction's over, remind her she’s feeling no pain, you are helping her to relax and together the two of you will deal with the next contraction. Remind her that she CAN do this and that you’re there for her.

Bottom Line: Before birth, talk to her about what to do if she does panic.